Boundaries

Push your boundaries, that’s what they are there for.

– Colleen Hoover

What are our boundaries? Who sets them? Are we staying in between the boundaries? How can we explore them? What are the limits? Can we stretch and expand them? Are we trying enough to reach our boundaries and expand?

Most of the time, we set the boundaries around us. There are situations where you are restricted to stay inside them due to your family or work conditions, but they are more physical. But the internal boundaries are in our reach, provided we try to work towards it.

What are the types of boundaries you have put around yourself? What you can do, where you can go, what you can think, what you can eat, how you behave, how you interact, how you handle your emotions, how you work, when to eat, what to learn and what not to… The limitless lists to limit yourself!

If I think more about the limits we put on ourselves, it looks like we are what we are, because of the limits we have set for us, the line of the boundary that we have drawn around us. Of course, there are certain physical limits and restrictions. But, once we free ourselves from the internal control to explore the boundaries and expand them, no one can stop us.

What kind of boundaries have you drawn?

For example, I had an aversion towards social media, not shared a line or a photo on social networking sites. While discussing my interest in writing, my friend suggested me to start a blog.

To begin with, I started writing a few articles on my PC. I was worried about sharing my thoughts online. Whether I can write well? How is my language, is it okay? Do people like to read the kind of topics I am interested? My hesitation to start a blog and publish what I write was so high, it almost felt like someone would trouble me for what I have written!

I had a long chat with my friend on the pros and cons of blogging that reminded me that writing is my passion, I could write on topics of my choice and the way I like to write. I realized that it is up to the readers to select the topics they want to read.

Though I wanted to write and explore my writing skills, the hesitation sprang out due to the imaginary boundary around me. Writing on my PC and discussing with known people was easy. Publishing the posts to a known or unknown audience was outside my comfort zone. I was worried about the feedback that I may get for my posts. So I wasn’t ready to explore my boundaries, write, publish and face what happens next. Finally, I could manage it with my first blog.

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.

– Brian Tracy

Another boundary that I am facing is to write stories; to be part of the creative process and experience the emotional waves that may come up while writing. Hence, I am trying to take shelter with the excuses.
My excuse for stories – I tend to get involved in the stories I read and take time to come out of those characters, so it may be disturbing for me to write stories and experience the journey of the characters.
If we see this matter from another angle, the same excuse can be used as a strength. My nature of getting involved in the characters of the stories could make it easier to create new characters and build stories. However, still I am not ready to explore that boundary.

Writing on this topic made me think and explore myself on this specific boundary. There are many more varieties of lines I would have drawn around me to stay in the comfort zone and give excuses to cross those boundaries.

Which are the boundaries you have drawn around yourself? Have you given any thoughts on those invisible lines? Are you finding excuses to stay in the comfort zone? It’s time to look out for the ways and directions to move out of it.

—Anitha KC

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